I've been meaning to read this for a while, and I'm glad I finally remembered to! I hope I get to read the rest of it tonight, as it's a good read. You're pulling together a nice sense of characterization and setting. Most importantly, I'm looking forward to seeing what happens next.

A small grammatical note - in both this chapter and the last, you use 'who's' to indicate possession. That'd be 'whose.' :)