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Title: Adjusting Perspective
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Adjusting Perspective CH 3 of 3
*********************************
He splashed water on his face to get the blood off and revive himself, wet a paper towel and scrubbed at his face, daubing at the lip carefully. He certainly couldn't keep allowing them to use him this way against Byerly. Yeah, this getting shocked business was painful as hell, but that wasn't what really annoyed him. The pisser was that it so effectively blocked him from getting anything done. And then there was the possibility that he would be a true drooling idiot by the time this all was over. Yes, that was a concern. Would Byerly like him as well with half a brain? /Stop measuring things in terms of Byerly!/ Byerly was risking too much for him. But Ivan's duty to the Imperium took precidence over his brain cells. Still, what could he effectively manage to *do* in this situation? A suicidal run against Saulotte, hoping that the momentum of his unconscious body would carry his goal through? Likely the muscle spasms from the ensuing shock would ensure that would go nowhere, and when he woke up he would be tied hand and foot. He paced the bathroom, climbed up on the toilet seat to inspect the high window - painted shut. He hopped down. He could kill himself. Then they couldn't use him against Byerly. He could hit himself on the head with the toilet seat until he lost consciousness and hope that he drowned in the bowl. Of course they could pretend he was still alive until Byerly got back.
No they couldn't. There was a mic on this collar, there almost had to be. Or on him, somewhere, because Byerly had heard him getting shocked - that was Saulotte's immediate hold on By. Maybe he could be talking to By right now! The thought was heartening. By wouldn't be able to speak back, but still, Ivan could encourage him or something... What he should do was remind him that Ivan Vorpatril's life wasn't important. Or, no, there didn't have to be a mic on him - it could just as well be on the handset Saulotte used. As long as they were in the same room, Ivan probably made plenty of noise when he was shocked, especially that last time with the falling and flopping around. Damn. Still, he'd outlined the fact that his own death probably wouldn't help the situation much. Unless it drove Byerly around the bend and he subsequently killed Saulotte and his minions with his bare hands. Might as well stay alive for now and see if something a bit less drastic would present itself.
He wandered back into the office trying to look as limp and worn out as he could and slumped back down at his desk, put his head on his folded arms.
The door was opening. Ivan raised his head, blinking, realized he was trailing a string of saliva and wiped at it in embarassment. He had dozed off after all, and Byerly, looking exhausted, was being escorted back in by the chauffeur.
"Off to bed with you two," Saulotte ordered, all too cheerily, Ivan thought. Things must have gone well. "We're working merchants with much to do in the morning! No rest for the wicked and all that. You'll have our guest room back there all to yourselves. Dolin, hup hup. Guard duty. My turn to nap."
Ivan stood, stretched the kinks out of his neck, and staggered toward the door Saulotte had indicated and which Byerly was entering. It was a master office, no less shabby than the outer office and smaller. The blankets which the chauffeur had brought in earlier had been dumped in a pile in the small space between the chair in front of the desk and the door. Ivan shut the door behind him and he and Byerly moved together as though pulled by a gravity. They leaned on each other for a few moments, too tired to do more than draw strength from each other's presence, and then they forced themselves to part and, by some telepathy, each took a side of the desk and shoved it back against the wall to make space for the bedclothes to be spread out. Then they set to work making their bed, murmuring suggestions to each other as to how to arrainge the blankets as cover or mattress. "The puffiest one on the bottom for padding." ... "These two on top?" ... "Will we be warm enough?" "Should do. We'll keep our clothes on." They both glanced at the door at that, then Ivan got up to turn the lights out.
His hand on the light switch he looked at Byerly, who was removing his shoes and belt, and he smiled a little at how normal this felt. It was completely abnormal. They were making a camp bed on an office floor. They were kidnappees. The rightness was because they were together, and he suddenly felt like he was a kid again, on a camping trip. Yes there were deadly serious people in the next room, but he was going to snatch this moment with both hands. After all, they could die tomorrow. He toed his boots off and burrowed in after By, and they rolled together and huddled.
"Are you okay? When I heard..."
"I'm fine. Tired, but happy to see you."
Their words tumbled out over each other in an almost giddy intensity.
"Did you think there was any way I would not come back for you?" Byerly demanded, with a smile in his voice and a quirk at the corner of his mouth. Ivan could barely see his face in the dark, but enough to land a kiss at the corner of his mouth, and then one on an eyebrow.
"No. I didn't think that for a minute. I knew you would." He laid a hand along the side of Byerly's face and said more seriously, "You shouldn't have, though. You should have just gone straight to someone, anyone, and had this place surrounded and them taken."
"No. I couldn't."
"But your job -"
"Screw my job."
"It could be worse than just your job, though. This could look really bad, trying to sell weapons. Charges of treason would mean..." He couldn't say it. He didn't even want to think it.
Byerly smoothed the short hair at the back of Ivan's head, kneeded the back of his neck above the collar. "Don't worry. I'll deal with that. I have a plan," his voice lowered to a comforting, barely audible, murmur. "Besides, I've gathered some good information tonight about certain people. This could be very useful stuff, and I'd never have had the chance to get it, otherwise."
"You're insane," Ivan muttered back, with a little hope returning. He wasn't sure it would work as defense against a treason charge, but it was worth a try.
"You love me that way."
"Yes -" Ivan's voice caught in his throat. What was he saying? Was he really saying he loved Byerly? "I love that about you."
"And I love that you didn't lose faith in me." Byerly kissed him seriously, then, with his tongue doing it's interesting things and his body pressing all against Ivan's, moving, surging, intently, and Ivan's body was rising to meet it, even though he was so tired. Still, he knew he couldn't carry anything through, and the possibility that someone in the next room was listening in on them - most probably - served well to quench his interest. When they broke to breath he rested his forhead against Ivan's. "My cousin thinks I'm falling in love with you."
"You talk to *Dono* about me??" Ivan yelped, pulling back.
"Dono likes you." Byerly grinned. "Says you're a big, sweet, lug, faithful as a dog - I guess that means in other ways besides sexually, since dogs are not known for being able to stay away from bitches in heat."
"I could stay away from anyone you wanted me to," Ivan sputtered out, before he could stop himself. It seemed like such an unfair accusation, when he'd barely had sex with anybody, lately. Aside from Dolores, last week, but that hardly counted. He barely remembered it compared to the last time with Byerly and the emptiness of the days without him.
"Any particular one? So long as I don't ask you to stay away from everyone else? That's okay, though. I don't ask you to. We're not married."
"Have you ever thought about that, By?"
"Not being married? I thank my luck every day."
"Yeah? You never think that maybe it might be nice to have kids?"
"I guess I can't say it's never crossed my mind, but I can't see how it could happen. I'm not the marrying type."
"No-one would say I was, either. And I've always agreed with them on that. It seems to me that if you want to stay married for any length of time you really have to both be quite interesting to each other. Usually the women I've dated have gotten bored with me, or me with them, or I got distracted by someone new I met."
"I can't imagine why they'd get bored with you. Maybe you don't talk with them like you do with me."
Ivan couldn't speak, his chest felt tight with a proud pleasure that Byerly would say such a thing. "I'm dull. I'm not all sparkling wit. Like you. I run out of things to say to them." The last sentence sighed out as he wondered how he was going to get back around to saying what he'd thought he might be about to say. Did he want to say it? Might as well take the bull by the horns. "But, uh, what about it? Do you think I'd be someone you might marry? Hypothetically?"
Byerly chuckled. "Yeah, I think you'd make a great husband. Hypothetically."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
Ivan paused, not sure quite what to say. "My cousin thinks... the same your cousin does."
Byerly grinned broadly, and mocked him; "You talk to *Miles* about me?"
Ivan smiled. "Yeah. "Miles likes you. Not like Dono likes me, I think. I hope. And he'll help you with the... you know." Ivan mouthed 'treason charges' at Byerly.
Byerly's smile dropped. "Yes, I saw him this evening, you know, and he said hello. Asked when he might expect to catch up with you, seeing as he missed you, yesterday."
"Missed me?" Ivan remembered the note he had written. It had been delivered after all! /Bless that coffee shop boy./ "Oh, that's right. It seems so long ago."
"I told him I was sure it would be soon." Byerly gave him another peck on the lips, and then a soft one below his ear with a little flick of his tongue. "But we need to sleep, now," he whispered. "Damn-I'm-tired." He dropped back and smiled up at Ivan for a moment before closing his eyes. Ivan realized he could see Byerly's face more clearly than he had a few minutes before, and rolled his head to see that the light coming from the window was brighter. Fine, almost morning, then. He was still going to catch a few winks. It wouldn't be the first time he'd gone to sleep as the sun was rising, and it probably wouldn't be the last.
* * *
“Wake up, lovebirds! Breakfast has arrived!”
Oh god, Saulotte was a morning person. Ivan was afraid he might lose control and strangle the man, shock collar or no.
“Ivan?” Byerly was pushing himself upright and gazing at him with a look that was an odd mixture of... something. Part of it seemed to be distress. “I have to tell you something.”
“Mm?”
“That collar is a really ugly piece of work and it disgusts me. But... I've got to admit," - he traced a finger around the corner of Ivan's jaw - "it looks rather fetching on you. If we get married can I get you a better looking one?”
“Whatever you want,” Ivan murmured with half-lidded eyes - Byerly could do that trick much more effectively, but Ivan thought it only fitting to play it back at him once in a while.
“I *like* that about you. Always willing to try something new.” Byerly descended on his mouth ravenously and they delighted for a few moments before ruefully pulling back. “We should get that breakfast before it's all gone. I'm sure they won't hesitate to eat our shares.”
There wasn't much left, and it was greasy and almost cold, but there was hot coffee and plenty of pastries. Ivan and Byerly sat together at the desk on their side of the room and somehow in the morning light everything looked much better. The worn floor, beaten walls and furnishings, looked picturesque, and their kidnappers seemed almost chummy. Still sitting on the other side of the room, but Saulotte was in a very good mood.
"Lord Vorrutyer, I'm impressed with your ability to find the customers. If you ever want off this benighted planet we could use your talents."
"Thank you, Mr. Saulotte," Byerly responded, with a tone in which Ivan could hear a quiet bristle, "But this benighted planet *is* my home, and my job, such as it is, may help to make it a better place."
The other two were even verging on sociable, and they had set up one of handsets with small speakers to provide a continuous stream of pleasant instrumental music. Ivan spared a thought for Martial, still absent in the hospital, and felt a bit of remorse for his broken jaw - though still painfully proud that Byerly had inflicted it.
“By...?
“Hm?"
"That concussion... how did you come by that?”
"Oh, that.” He waved his hand negligently, as though concussions were a dime a dozen and barely worth noticing. “When Saulotte and his first potential buyer had their falling out. Completely incidental. You know how Vors can be in their cups. During that belligerent phase things get broken, heads not the least of them.”
“My mother thought it had something to do with your cover being compromised.”
Byerly blinked. “I guess I wasn't clear when I first contacted her. Things were a little fuzzy for me at the time. The two things happened congruently, but they weren't actually directly connected."
"She wanted me to stay away from you in case I was making it difficult for you. And I thought that was why you said I shouldn't visit you."
"I said what?"
"'Not a good time' you said."
"Oh, well I didn't want you caught up in all *this*. I was afraid something like this would happen."
"You *have* said before that I make things harder for you."
Byerly studied him for a moment. "I'm sorry I said that." He looked down, toyed with his pastry. "It's true, but I wish I hadn't said it. You're worth it. I do like my job, but last night... I realized. I'd rather have you."
Ivan's ears burned and his eyes dropped, but he couldn't help but smile, and when he looked back Byerly was smiling at him.
Something was beeping. Dolin set down his handset and turned his head this way and that, then went to a panel box on the wall. After scrabbling at the tiny metal loop that was the handle he got it to pop up and got his finger through it and pulled the box open.
"It's a door alarm!" he called out.
Saulotte bounced out of his chair and was aiming the remote at Ivan. "What is this, Vorrutyer? Who's followed you here?"
"I don't know what it is. Maybe it's just a random break in? It does happen, sometimes, you know."
"Don't jerk me around, Vorrutyer!"
Fire was shredding Ivan's every nerve ending, he was screaming and screaming, the world was spinning, his throat was raw. Wait. He should stop now. It was over. A vast wasteland stretched out before his eyes, something huge tumbled and resolved into a bit of fluff rolling slowly in some errant breaze, great grooves like canals extending into the distance snapped into focus as the grain of the floorboards. People were trampling all around him, rushing this way and that, leaping over him. He curled up tight to avoid being stepped on, and whimpered, then a hand was gripping his shoulder and Miles was there, telling him it was all over.
* * *
The ImpSec strike force was nominally under the command of a young Captain named Pappaconstantine, though he was taking orders, with no little awe, not to mention some small confusion as to how this situation had come about, from Lord Auditor Vorkosigan. The team had immobilized two armed men with ruthless efficiency before they turned to Lord Vorrutyer, who was still attempting to smash a third man's head in against the wooden floor. Even then they held off for a moment, observing, but their jobs demanded that they inturrupt before the potential prisoner and informant was wholly dead, so, with reluctance, Captain Pappaconstantine stepped forward and grasped Lord Vorrutyer's shoulder.
"Sir! Leave off, sir! We'll take it from here."
Vorrutyer froze. The other man, who the would soon know as Saulotte, was still conscious, and a flick of his eyes showed that he fully understood the nerve disruptor that the Captain pressed to his temple. Vorrutyer sat back, straddling Saulotte's stomach and making no effort to lift his weight off it.
"The remote," Vorrutyer said.
"Sir?"
"There's a remote for a shock collar lying around on the floor here, somewhere, Captain. We need to find it and not step on it or trigger it accidently. The collar is around the neck of Lord Ivan Vorpatril."
Vorpatril was slowly sitting up, now, with help from Lord Vorkosigan, and he was ash-pale, sweaty, and shaking like a man in drug withdrawals.
A quick search turned it up, and one of the men who had been raised on a farm soon had the collar disabled and removed. Vorpatril was administered synergine by a medic who had followed the team in, then moved to a cot in the corner where he could lie quietly for a few minutes while the suspects were removed from the scene. Lord Vorrutyer sat by the cot with a hand on Lord Vorpatril's shoulder until the team was ready to move them out, and Lord Vorkosigan stood by, fidgeting and beaming at his cousin and his cousin's friend.
* * *
Epilogue: In which Byerly makes egg toast.
The doctor who had checked Ivan out at the emergency room had decided there was very little they could do for him - "Really all he needs now is rest," - so Miles had asked around for a lift for Byerly and Ivan, and a dark-haired young Captain had jumped at the chance to offer.
"Who's he?" Ivan whispered in the back of the groundcar as the Captain drove them to the building Byerly lived in.
"Captain Pappaconstantine. He led the ImpSec strike force that saved us."
"What was that name again?"
"Oh really, Ivan."
"He likes you. Why's he like you so well?"
"Ivan."
"He does, I can tell. Why?"
Byerly turned away and gazed out of the window of the groundcar with a slight smile. "Maybe because he witnessed me beating Saulotte's head in. These ImpSec men go for that sort of thing I understand. Ivan?" He turned back to Ivan and looked very squarly at him. "That note to Miles. That was very clever, I'm impressed."
Ivan was too worn out to even fidget, so he just said, "Thanks," but he was smiling and blushing as he leaned back into the seat and closed his eyes. It might mean trouble for him if it got out that he'd come up with something clever, but he liked the feeling of By being proud of him.
As soon they entered the apartment By pushed Ivan forceably down on the couch. Not difficult as Ivan had all the strength of a two-day old kitten, and, though he didn't want to admit it, was quite grateful to be made to rest.
"Stay right there while I cook you something."
"Didn't we just have breakfast?"
"We were at the hospital for hours."
"Don't go to any bother. I'm not really hungry."
"You're tanked on synergine at the moment - as soon as that drops off you'll be falling dead asleep and you'll wake up starving. You should try to have a little bite before you crash to keep your strength up. Doctor's orders."
"Really?"
"No, the doctor didn't think to say it, but I'm conversant with this effect, so take my word for it."
"Okay." Ivan gave in with a smile and Byerly gave him a quick peck. It felt really nice to have Byerly fuss over him, he wasn't complaining, only making a token resistance in order to be polite. He dozed off for a few minutes, listening to the bustle in the kitchen, and was awakened by Byerly setting plates on the coffee table. Ivan pushed upright and Byerly seated himself on the couch beside him when he returned with the platter of egg toast and a variety of condiments to top them with. "This is marvelous," Ivan mumbled around his second bite.
"I'm very handy in the kitchen. I'd make a good hypothetical wife."
Ivan swallowed hard in surprise, washed the lump down with some tea and finally said, "It was Miles's idea. *He* brought up this androgenesis thing." At Byerly's look Ivan offered, "Lets two guys have kids."
"I know what the word means, but..."
"Yeah, they've figured it out, now. How to do it."
Now Byerly was beginning to look slightly alarmed. "Miles thinks you and I should have *kids*?"
"No, no, that's not what he said, really." /"Backpeddle! Quick!"/ "He said the option was there if we should ever want to. I'm not at all sure *I'm* ready for that. But his point was that with procreation not a barrier he thought the possibility might be there of making a legal case for marriage."
Byerly's eyes widened. "So... you weren't joking."
"No, I - I don't know if it would be possible, really, any time soon, and I wouldn't want to rush you into anything, and I just said it to - yeah, I was joking. I guess. And, um. Yeah."
The expression on Byerly's face was going from outright stunned to something more like perplexed, and continued metamorphosing to a look that was still somewhat confused but pleased and almost bashful. Ivan didn't think he'd ever seen Byerly look quite like that, and he'd seen the man in quite a variety of moods in the past few months. By's hand moved over his own. "You realize it would cause tremendous trouble. Incalculable. I don't know what your cousin is trying to do."
"I think it has to do with his never ending campaign to drag Barrayar into the same century with the rest of the galaxy."
"Which is why it'll make us a target for every nutcase who doesn't want that to happen."
"Yeah. I hate the idea for that. I'd rather have my privacy and a nice boring life. But you like danger, and you said you'd like to work to make this planet a better place."
"You really want to do this?"
"No. Yes. I want to be with you."
Byerly smiled and offered him another egg toast. "Eat up. Sleep. We'll discuss it in the morning."
*******
end
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Adjusting Perspective CH 3 of 3
*********************************
He splashed water on his face to get the blood off and revive himself, wet a paper towel and scrubbed at his face, daubing at the lip carefully. He certainly couldn't keep allowing them to use him this way against Byerly. Yeah, this getting shocked business was painful as hell, but that wasn't what really annoyed him. The pisser was that it so effectively blocked him from getting anything done. And then there was the possibility that he would be a true drooling idiot by the time this all was over. Yes, that was a concern. Would Byerly like him as well with half a brain? /Stop measuring things in terms of Byerly!/ Byerly was risking too much for him. But Ivan's duty to the Imperium took precidence over his brain cells. Still, what could he effectively manage to *do* in this situation? A suicidal run against Saulotte, hoping that the momentum of his unconscious body would carry his goal through? Likely the muscle spasms from the ensuing shock would ensure that would go nowhere, and when he woke up he would be tied hand and foot. He paced the bathroom, climbed up on the toilet seat to inspect the high window - painted shut. He hopped down. He could kill himself. Then they couldn't use him against Byerly. He could hit himself on the head with the toilet seat until he lost consciousness and hope that he drowned in the bowl. Of course they could pretend he was still alive until Byerly got back.
No they couldn't. There was a mic on this collar, there almost had to be. Or on him, somewhere, because Byerly had heard him getting shocked - that was Saulotte's immediate hold on By. Maybe he could be talking to By right now! The thought was heartening. By wouldn't be able to speak back, but still, Ivan could encourage him or something... What he should do was remind him that Ivan Vorpatril's life wasn't important. Or, no, there didn't have to be a mic on him - it could just as well be on the handset Saulotte used. As long as they were in the same room, Ivan probably made plenty of noise when he was shocked, especially that last time with the falling and flopping around. Damn. Still, he'd outlined the fact that his own death probably wouldn't help the situation much. Unless it drove Byerly around the bend and he subsequently killed Saulotte and his minions with his bare hands. Might as well stay alive for now and see if something a bit less drastic would present itself.
He wandered back into the office trying to look as limp and worn out as he could and slumped back down at his desk, put his head on his folded arms.
The door was opening. Ivan raised his head, blinking, realized he was trailing a string of saliva and wiped at it in embarassment. He had dozed off after all, and Byerly, looking exhausted, was being escorted back in by the chauffeur.
"Off to bed with you two," Saulotte ordered, all too cheerily, Ivan thought. Things must have gone well. "We're working merchants with much to do in the morning! No rest for the wicked and all that. You'll have our guest room back there all to yourselves. Dolin, hup hup. Guard duty. My turn to nap."
Ivan stood, stretched the kinks out of his neck, and staggered toward the door Saulotte had indicated and which Byerly was entering. It was a master office, no less shabby than the outer office and smaller. The blankets which the chauffeur had brought in earlier had been dumped in a pile in the small space between the chair in front of the desk and the door. Ivan shut the door behind him and he and Byerly moved together as though pulled by a gravity. They leaned on each other for a few moments, too tired to do more than draw strength from each other's presence, and then they forced themselves to part and, by some telepathy, each took a side of the desk and shoved it back against the wall to make space for the bedclothes to be spread out. Then they set to work making their bed, murmuring suggestions to each other as to how to arrainge the blankets as cover or mattress. "The puffiest one on the bottom for padding." ... "These two on top?" ... "Will we be warm enough?" "Should do. We'll keep our clothes on." They both glanced at the door at that, then Ivan got up to turn the lights out.
His hand on the light switch he looked at Byerly, who was removing his shoes and belt, and he smiled a little at how normal this felt. It was completely abnormal. They were making a camp bed on an office floor. They were kidnappees. The rightness was because they were together, and he suddenly felt like he was a kid again, on a camping trip. Yes there were deadly serious people in the next room, but he was going to snatch this moment with both hands. After all, they could die tomorrow. He toed his boots off and burrowed in after By, and they rolled together and huddled.
"Are you okay? When I heard..."
"I'm fine. Tired, but happy to see you."
Their words tumbled out over each other in an almost giddy intensity.
"Did you think there was any way I would not come back for you?" Byerly demanded, with a smile in his voice and a quirk at the corner of his mouth. Ivan could barely see his face in the dark, but enough to land a kiss at the corner of his mouth, and then one on an eyebrow.
"No. I didn't think that for a minute. I knew you would." He laid a hand along the side of Byerly's face and said more seriously, "You shouldn't have, though. You should have just gone straight to someone, anyone, and had this place surrounded and them taken."
"No. I couldn't."
"But your job -"
"Screw my job."
"It could be worse than just your job, though. This could look really bad, trying to sell weapons. Charges of treason would mean..." He couldn't say it. He didn't even want to think it.
Byerly smoothed the short hair at the back of Ivan's head, kneeded the back of his neck above the collar. "Don't worry. I'll deal with that. I have a plan," his voice lowered to a comforting, barely audible, murmur. "Besides, I've gathered some good information tonight about certain people. This could be very useful stuff, and I'd never have had the chance to get it, otherwise."
"You're insane," Ivan muttered back, with a little hope returning. He wasn't sure it would work as defense against a treason charge, but it was worth a try.
"You love me that way."
"Yes -" Ivan's voice caught in his throat. What was he saying? Was he really saying he loved Byerly? "I love that about you."
"And I love that you didn't lose faith in me." Byerly kissed him seriously, then, with his tongue doing it's interesting things and his body pressing all against Ivan's, moving, surging, intently, and Ivan's body was rising to meet it, even though he was so tired. Still, he knew he couldn't carry anything through, and the possibility that someone in the next room was listening in on them - most probably - served well to quench his interest. When they broke to breath he rested his forhead against Ivan's. "My cousin thinks I'm falling in love with you."
"You talk to *Dono* about me??" Ivan yelped, pulling back.
"Dono likes you." Byerly grinned. "Says you're a big, sweet, lug, faithful as a dog - I guess that means in other ways besides sexually, since dogs are not known for being able to stay away from bitches in heat."
"I could stay away from anyone you wanted me to," Ivan sputtered out, before he could stop himself. It seemed like such an unfair accusation, when he'd barely had sex with anybody, lately. Aside from Dolores, last week, but that hardly counted. He barely remembered it compared to the last time with Byerly and the emptiness of the days without him.
"Any particular one? So long as I don't ask you to stay away from everyone else? That's okay, though. I don't ask you to. We're not married."
"Have you ever thought about that, By?"
"Not being married? I thank my luck every day."
"Yeah? You never think that maybe it might be nice to have kids?"
"I guess I can't say it's never crossed my mind, but I can't see how it could happen. I'm not the marrying type."
"No-one would say I was, either. And I've always agreed with them on that. It seems to me that if you want to stay married for any length of time you really have to both be quite interesting to each other. Usually the women I've dated have gotten bored with me, or me with them, or I got distracted by someone new I met."
"I can't imagine why they'd get bored with you. Maybe you don't talk with them like you do with me."
Ivan couldn't speak, his chest felt tight with a proud pleasure that Byerly would say such a thing. "I'm dull. I'm not all sparkling wit. Like you. I run out of things to say to them." The last sentence sighed out as he wondered how he was going to get back around to saying what he'd thought he might be about to say. Did he want to say it? Might as well take the bull by the horns. "But, uh, what about it? Do you think I'd be someone you might marry? Hypothetically?"
Byerly chuckled. "Yeah, I think you'd make a great husband. Hypothetically."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
Ivan paused, not sure quite what to say. "My cousin thinks... the same your cousin does."
Byerly grinned broadly, and mocked him; "You talk to *Miles* about me?"
Ivan smiled. "Yeah. "Miles likes you. Not like Dono likes me, I think. I hope. And he'll help you with the... you know." Ivan mouthed 'treason charges' at Byerly.
Byerly's smile dropped. "Yes, I saw him this evening, you know, and he said hello. Asked when he might expect to catch up with you, seeing as he missed you, yesterday."
"Missed me?" Ivan remembered the note he had written. It had been delivered after all! /Bless that coffee shop boy./ "Oh, that's right. It seems so long ago."
"I told him I was sure it would be soon." Byerly gave him another peck on the lips, and then a soft one below his ear with a little flick of his tongue. "But we need to sleep, now," he whispered. "Damn-I'm-tired." He dropped back and smiled up at Ivan for a moment before closing his eyes. Ivan realized he could see Byerly's face more clearly than he had a few minutes before, and rolled his head to see that the light coming from the window was brighter. Fine, almost morning, then. He was still going to catch a few winks. It wouldn't be the first time he'd gone to sleep as the sun was rising, and it probably wouldn't be the last.
* * *
“Wake up, lovebirds! Breakfast has arrived!”
Oh god, Saulotte was a morning person. Ivan was afraid he might lose control and strangle the man, shock collar or no.
“Ivan?” Byerly was pushing himself upright and gazing at him with a look that was an odd mixture of... something. Part of it seemed to be distress. “I have to tell you something.”
“Mm?”
“That collar is a really ugly piece of work and it disgusts me. But... I've got to admit," - he traced a finger around the corner of Ivan's jaw - "it looks rather fetching on you. If we get married can I get you a better looking one?”
“Whatever you want,” Ivan murmured with half-lidded eyes - Byerly could do that trick much more effectively, but Ivan thought it only fitting to play it back at him once in a while.
“I *like* that about you. Always willing to try something new.” Byerly descended on his mouth ravenously and they delighted for a few moments before ruefully pulling back. “We should get that breakfast before it's all gone. I'm sure they won't hesitate to eat our shares.”
There wasn't much left, and it was greasy and almost cold, but there was hot coffee and plenty of pastries. Ivan and Byerly sat together at the desk on their side of the room and somehow in the morning light everything looked much better. The worn floor, beaten walls and furnishings, looked picturesque, and their kidnappers seemed almost chummy. Still sitting on the other side of the room, but Saulotte was in a very good mood.
"Lord Vorrutyer, I'm impressed with your ability to find the customers. If you ever want off this benighted planet we could use your talents."
"Thank you, Mr. Saulotte," Byerly responded, with a tone in which Ivan could hear a quiet bristle, "But this benighted planet *is* my home, and my job, such as it is, may help to make it a better place."
The other two were even verging on sociable, and they had set up one of handsets with small speakers to provide a continuous stream of pleasant instrumental music. Ivan spared a thought for Martial, still absent in the hospital, and felt a bit of remorse for his broken jaw - though still painfully proud that Byerly had inflicted it.
“By...?
“Hm?"
"That concussion... how did you come by that?”
"Oh, that.” He waved his hand negligently, as though concussions were a dime a dozen and barely worth noticing. “When Saulotte and his first potential buyer had their falling out. Completely incidental. You know how Vors can be in their cups. During that belligerent phase things get broken, heads not the least of them.”
“My mother thought it had something to do with your cover being compromised.”
Byerly blinked. “I guess I wasn't clear when I first contacted her. Things were a little fuzzy for me at the time. The two things happened congruently, but they weren't actually directly connected."
"She wanted me to stay away from you in case I was making it difficult for you. And I thought that was why you said I shouldn't visit you."
"I said what?"
"'Not a good time' you said."
"Oh, well I didn't want you caught up in all *this*. I was afraid something like this would happen."
"You *have* said before that I make things harder for you."
Byerly studied him for a moment. "I'm sorry I said that." He looked down, toyed with his pastry. "It's true, but I wish I hadn't said it. You're worth it. I do like my job, but last night... I realized. I'd rather have you."
Ivan's ears burned and his eyes dropped, but he couldn't help but smile, and when he looked back Byerly was smiling at him.
Something was beeping. Dolin set down his handset and turned his head this way and that, then went to a panel box on the wall. After scrabbling at the tiny metal loop that was the handle he got it to pop up and got his finger through it and pulled the box open.
"It's a door alarm!" he called out.
Saulotte bounced out of his chair and was aiming the remote at Ivan. "What is this, Vorrutyer? Who's followed you here?"
"I don't know what it is. Maybe it's just a random break in? It does happen, sometimes, you know."
"Don't jerk me around, Vorrutyer!"
Fire was shredding Ivan's every nerve ending, he was screaming and screaming, the world was spinning, his throat was raw. Wait. He should stop now. It was over. A vast wasteland stretched out before his eyes, something huge tumbled and resolved into a bit of fluff rolling slowly in some errant breaze, great grooves like canals extending into the distance snapped into focus as the grain of the floorboards. People were trampling all around him, rushing this way and that, leaping over him. He curled up tight to avoid being stepped on, and whimpered, then a hand was gripping his shoulder and Miles was there, telling him it was all over.
* * *
The ImpSec strike force was nominally under the command of a young Captain named Pappaconstantine, though he was taking orders, with no little awe, not to mention some small confusion as to how this situation had come about, from Lord Auditor Vorkosigan. The team had immobilized two armed men with ruthless efficiency before they turned to Lord Vorrutyer, who was still attempting to smash a third man's head in against the wooden floor. Even then they held off for a moment, observing, but their jobs demanded that they inturrupt before the potential prisoner and informant was wholly dead, so, with reluctance, Captain Pappaconstantine stepped forward and grasped Lord Vorrutyer's shoulder.
"Sir! Leave off, sir! We'll take it from here."
Vorrutyer froze. The other man, who the would soon know as Saulotte, was still conscious, and a flick of his eyes showed that he fully understood the nerve disruptor that the Captain pressed to his temple. Vorrutyer sat back, straddling Saulotte's stomach and making no effort to lift his weight off it.
"The remote," Vorrutyer said.
"Sir?"
"There's a remote for a shock collar lying around on the floor here, somewhere, Captain. We need to find it and not step on it or trigger it accidently. The collar is around the neck of Lord Ivan Vorpatril."
Vorpatril was slowly sitting up, now, with help from Lord Vorkosigan, and he was ash-pale, sweaty, and shaking like a man in drug withdrawals.
A quick search turned it up, and one of the men who had been raised on a farm soon had the collar disabled and removed. Vorpatril was administered synergine by a medic who had followed the team in, then moved to a cot in the corner where he could lie quietly for a few minutes while the suspects were removed from the scene. Lord Vorrutyer sat by the cot with a hand on Lord Vorpatril's shoulder until the team was ready to move them out, and Lord Vorkosigan stood by, fidgeting and beaming at his cousin and his cousin's friend.
* * *
Epilogue: In which Byerly makes egg toast.
The doctor who had checked Ivan out at the emergency room had decided there was very little they could do for him - "Really all he needs now is rest," - so Miles had asked around for a lift for Byerly and Ivan, and a dark-haired young Captain had jumped at the chance to offer.
"Who's he?" Ivan whispered in the back of the groundcar as the Captain drove them to the building Byerly lived in.
"Captain Pappaconstantine. He led the ImpSec strike force that saved us."
"What was that name again?"
"Oh really, Ivan."
"He likes you. Why's he like you so well?"
"Ivan."
"He does, I can tell. Why?"
Byerly turned away and gazed out of the window of the groundcar with a slight smile. "Maybe because he witnessed me beating Saulotte's head in. These ImpSec men go for that sort of thing I understand. Ivan?" He turned back to Ivan and looked very squarly at him. "That note to Miles. That was very clever, I'm impressed."
Ivan was too worn out to even fidget, so he just said, "Thanks," but he was smiling and blushing as he leaned back into the seat and closed his eyes. It might mean trouble for him if it got out that he'd come up with something clever, but he liked the feeling of By being proud of him.
As soon they entered the apartment By pushed Ivan forceably down on the couch. Not difficult as Ivan had all the strength of a two-day old kitten, and, though he didn't want to admit it, was quite grateful to be made to rest.
"Stay right there while I cook you something."
"Didn't we just have breakfast?"
"We were at the hospital for hours."
"Don't go to any bother. I'm not really hungry."
"You're tanked on synergine at the moment - as soon as that drops off you'll be falling dead asleep and you'll wake up starving. You should try to have a little bite before you crash to keep your strength up. Doctor's orders."
"Really?"
"No, the doctor didn't think to say it, but I'm conversant with this effect, so take my word for it."
"Okay." Ivan gave in with a smile and Byerly gave him a quick peck. It felt really nice to have Byerly fuss over him, he wasn't complaining, only making a token resistance in order to be polite. He dozed off for a few minutes, listening to the bustle in the kitchen, and was awakened by Byerly setting plates on the coffee table. Ivan pushed upright and Byerly seated himself on the couch beside him when he returned with the platter of egg toast and a variety of condiments to top them with. "This is marvelous," Ivan mumbled around his second bite.
"I'm very handy in the kitchen. I'd make a good hypothetical wife."
Ivan swallowed hard in surprise, washed the lump down with some tea and finally said, "It was Miles's idea. *He* brought up this androgenesis thing." At Byerly's look Ivan offered, "Lets two guys have kids."
"I know what the word means, but..."
"Yeah, they've figured it out, now. How to do it."
Now Byerly was beginning to look slightly alarmed. "Miles thinks you and I should have *kids*?"
"No, no, that's not what he said, really." /"Backpeddle! Quick!"/ "He said the option was there if we should ever want to. I'm not at all sure *I'm* ready for that. But his point was that with procreation not a barrier he thought the possibility might be there of making a legal case for marriage."
Byerly's eyes widened. "So... you weren't joking."
"No, I - I don't know if it would be possible, really, any time soon, and I wouldn't want to rush you into anything, and I just said it to - yeah, I was joking. I guess. And, um. Yeah."
The expression on Byerly's face was going from outright stunned to something more like perplexed, and continued metamorphosing to a look that was still somewhat confused but pleased and almost bashful. Ivan didn't think he'd ever seen Byerly look quite like that, and he'd seen the man in quite a variety of moods in the past few months. By's hand moved over his own. "You realize it would cause tremendous trouble. Incalculable. I don't know what your cousin is trying to do."
"I think it has to do with his never ending campaign to drag Barrayar into the same century with the rest of the galaxy."
"Which is why it'll make us a target for every nutcase who doesn't want that to happen."
"Yeah. I hate the idea for that. I'd rather have my privacy and a nice boring life. But you like danger, and you said you'd like to work to make this planet a better place."
"You really want to do this?"
"No. Yes. I want to be with you."
Byerly smiled and offered him another egg toast. "Eat up. Sleep. We'll discuss it in the morning."
*******
end
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